Truth one: Giving inanimate objects personalities gets real creepy, real fast.
Truth two: I still think about Richard Karn sometimes, enough so that this thought ran through my head.
Truth three: Richard Karn needs to keep his shirt on.
|No, I'm seriously not. Don't even ask.|
Truth four: I make fancy Facebook timeline photos.
|This is my friend's guinea pig, if he were an astronaut. Related: I need a hobby. YES, I CHANGED THE WORD"HAMSTER" TO "GUINEA PIG" YOU FUCKING MAMMAL NAZIS. FUCK.|
Truth five: This is how you get tips.
|Guess which jar ol' Meaty used...|
Truth six: Applebee's needs to stop encouraging me.
|Truth 6.5: Howard is doing it wrong.|
That is all.